I do not know about you but, a while ago I was my favourite punch bag. No matter what happens, I was always, in my opinion, the one to be blamed. I was harsh on myself. Always, it was me who was guilty. I have seen only the flaws in me and was all the time punishing myself.
I have used different type of punishments. Sometimes I have just said or shout at myself, how stupid or whatever else, I am. Other times I was starving myself. It was not that I was doing this consciously. I did not feel hunger at all. Just later I have learned that this was my subconscious punishing me for my mistakes.
There were a few more ways I was punishing myself. But the most important is, that this is the past. Are you doing that to yourself? Are you punishing yourself for mistakes and flaws, I am sure, you easily find in yourself? You are not alone with this. It is a domain of a lot of people. To be self favourite punch bag.
Now, I am encouraging you to ask yourself a few questions. What you actually, getting from that way of treating yourself? Is that makes you feel better? Do you have any benefits from that? Do you like to do this to yourself? Is this way of doing help you with anything? How long are you going to do this to yourself?
This kind of thinking and behaving is usually taken from your young years. Even when you have a good childhood, your relatives could have a high expectations. This, even if you were not punished for failures, put the pressure on you that, in effect, makes you feel bad about yourself, not good enough.
I can bet that when you look deep in yourself, you find that this is not the way you want to act. Not the way you want to treat yourself. Moreover, doing this is not something you fully accept. You might have, not understand all of this, why you do this to yourself. Or even, same as me, you could not recognise some behaviours as punishments.
So, what can you do now with this new knowledge? Knowing this, you can decide consciously how you actually want to treat yourself. You can decide to drop punishing yourself and start to love yourself. And I hope this is your decision now. I wish you this, from the bottom of my heart.
Be positive, be blessed, peace out.
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