You might have a great goal, amazing vision of whom you want to be. What you would like to do in your life. Of what would you like to achieve. And yet you are not doing anything or very little to follow that vision of yours. Why this is happening and how can you prevent these situations? Let us check this now.
What is going on with blocking yourself?
How many times has it happened to you, that, doing something toward your goal, you say to yourself, I do not want to do this now? I am too tired. I don’t feel like doing it now. I will do it later. When in reality you haven’t felt this way. In reality, it was your fear or maybe laziness or anything else, distracting you from following your path to your goal. In current times, there are many distractions that try to steal your focus. There is a whole branch of science that studies this topic, of how to get you in some activity, that will keep you in your comfort zone and at the same time, make a profit on you, for those who cross that comfort zone boundary.
Nevertheless. I do not know about you. Thou, for me, it was happening quite often. I got excited about something, I thought this is what I want to do, whom I want to be, yet my fear, and sometimes laziness as well, took over and I didn’t do anything. Or I started but then I found something better, more interesting. Or more appealing to me. So I drop the first thing. And I was just jumping here and there. From one activity to another. Feeling more and more stressed, anxious and annoyed. Do you know that feeling? It is pretty stressful and disheartening, isn’t it? You might also feel discouraged and like there is no point in starting anything, as it will end up the same way as everything else you have tried.
No matter, how great the goal, you choose for yourself, looks like. No matter, how amazing it might be your life when you will achieve your goal. All this and many more things, does not matter. You just do not want to feel the disappointment of failure again, so you do very little or even nothing at all. Just to avoid that feeling. You allow your past experiences of failures, to stop you. To not let you do anything, to not start and follow your path, to your goal. Subconsciously, you are set to mode, “Yes, let’s try this, but not too hard, as it will surely end up like everything else earlier.”
Why are you undermining yourself?
There might be many reasons to your sabotaging your progress. Some of them are fear. And it is not fear of failure. You know failure to good to be afraid of it. It is the fear of success. Yes, you heard me right. You might feel fear of victory. Of achieving your goal. It happens, cause in your life, you, most likely, experience more failures than victories. Also, what happens quite often, our society has a habit to condemn and pinpoint every defeat very harshly. Where success is mostly accepted as something expected. Nothing unusual. Moreover, honestly, no one prepares you, that failures are good and necessary for you to grow, right?
Twisted, I know. Yet, true. Observe your surroundings if you want proves. After a few minutes of excitement that you achieve something. You and all witnesses, are usually, just forgetting about that. Stop thinking about your success and focus on doing another thing. Which is good, in a sense, you are not resting in glory. Yet, what happens when you are refocusing on a new task? You might actually forget to congratulate yourself, to pat yourself at the back. To sit for a while and contemplate, how well you have done. To feel that proud of – I did it. Instead, you jump into another activity.
Other things that “help” you in undermining yourself and your plans are outside distractions. You start doing something for your future and then you hear that little ping on your phone. Or a thought just pops – “I wonder how the action in my favourite series will evolve further. What this hero will do now” And so on. You can multiply these kinds of examples infinitely. Lastly, your goal might not be really yours. Let say, you see something that is nice and you get attracted to that, without actually thinking if, it is something, that you really want. Or maybe it is some suggestion from the outside world, saying that you will be, let say, liked by others, doing or having it.
How can you stop destroying your plans?
With outside distractions thing is actually pretty easy. You can switch your phone into DnD mode or even better in Fly mode and put it away from your reach and view. If you need to work on the computer, you might want to switch off the WiFi or if you need it there are tools that you can block specific websites for a while. This, making it harder to reach, action, makes you more focused on the task at hand. Take care of having a glass of water at hand in case you will need a drink. You might want to have some nuts or fruits beside as well as a form of a snack. Have a comfy, but too much, chair.
For inside distractions. To find what is this thing, or things, that is diverting your attention, you might want to take a pen and paper and start asking yourself questions and answering them. Questions like – why do I block myself? What I am afraid of? Why do I want to do this thing? Is that really something I want to do? Or it was suggested to me by somebody? If this is something of mine, something I really want, how this will transform my life? How will my life look when I achieve that? What is the one simple thing that I can do now, at this moment? How can I remove this blockage or distraction? How do I feel about that? And so on.
Recently, I came across a method that might also be helpful. it is called a 16 hours rule. You just take, again, paper and pen and write down, hour by hour, moment by moment, a very detailed story of your day in a moment when you achieve your goal. When you get to the point, that you will have your new life. When this one of your transformations will be accomplished. Be very specific. You might also add there what new goal you will set for yourself. If you like, you might write a plan for a whole week. Then every time you feel low, just read it to yourself and imagine it. Feel it as if it already happens.
Briefly, we talk about what do you sometimes do to yourself when you have to do some work for yourself. We find why you do this and how can you alter this. I am certain, you now know, what distractors you need to remove from your workspace. As well as how to do this. In any case, you would like to know more or need some support, I would love to help you with this. Just drop me a message in the comment section.
Blessings upon you my friend.
See a typo or inaccuracy? Please contact us so we can fix it!
Mentality & Life Coach I will support YOU in finding Clarity, growing your business, creating a clear plan of action and overcoming any blockages. Contact me for details and so we can see if this is a good fit. Facebook - LinkedIn - Contact page.